“Patience is impatience in disguise .....” amz
We’re told to be patient, good things come to those to who wait - but I believe that to be successful we need to be impatient - to be an artist and creative we need to be impatient to see what results we want and strive to get them
I am often told when I am being observed, ‘I haven’t got enough patience to do that’ - well its not patience which makes me want to paint, or draw - its my impatience that drives me to fill that blank canvas, not leave the sketch book empty, fill those pages with my stories as quickly as my brain allows my hands to do the work.
Self-taught creative;
I get asked all the time ‘where did you study, how did you learn’ - well as most artists say - I’m self taught. But I don’t think this is honestly the case - if you’ve seen my socials or you’ve joined my mailing list you will know my favourite quote about being creative and the main tag line “born qualified”. - it is so true - I was born with this gift, no one told me then it was a gift, I was born already having a purpose in life. I love that - I love knowing that I have a little part of own history which I pour in to my work every day.
Early inspo’ on the farm;
As a child and the youngest of 12 - yes 12, no my mum didn’t have 12 kids but she did remarry and so did my dad, so we merged in to 2 big families. I was young, and so this is all I knew. My days were spent through the 90s, whiling away the hours on the farm, and playing in the village. Those were the days when our parents didn’t really care where we were, as long as we came home for tea. We would ride our bikes across the fields for hours, adventure through the woods and exploring the local caves in the Shropshire hills. I remember these days when my crafting and creating began, I would copy the weekly cartoons out of the Sunday papers, and redraw posters, I would write stories and comics and magazines and make my own games and puzzles, I oozed creativity even at such a young age. I was born with it, I don’t know where it came from, but I had the gift and I was drawn to it.
Flying the nest;
I left home at 16 with a dream of owning my own studio and opening a little gallery to support other artists and creatives - even then, i had the same dream. I didn’t just leave home - I ran away to the coast in Wales, an entirely different country but only 1.5 hours away. But I went all the same, I met people who I felt were my people, and I worked on the holiday camps between studying in the winters. When I was 18 I went to art college, I was able to support myself now by working in the city, so I worked my way through college and got myself to uni.
Big city lights.. try’n to get by...;
During college in Bangor I was privileged to have extremely talented art business owners as my tutors, I learned very early on that art was a business and my dream of owning my own studio developed in to owning my own events business. I wanted to curate, I wanted to design beautiful spaces and I wanted to share my success in supporting other artists. I was the only one at college doing an exam in Art History; studying the great artists and the stories of history was my inspiration to go to university to learn the management of arts and how it sits with in our cultures. Fortunately the only course was in Sheffield, where 2 of my sisters where already living - so this was my next move.
Travelling, Trips and Techno,
Well, not quite so much techno - that was so much more apart of my days on the beach (I’ll save that story for another blog post). Uni was a time to party - I’d paid my own way so it wasn’t like my parents were investing in my ‘education’ anymore; but it did help me find my way in to the events world, and work on the dream some more. I worked in bars, and pubs, and clubs and spent late nights in closed venues, surrounded by music, art and all the amazingness of Sheffield. (have you ever been? you should come visit)
Sheffield is super...
After the first year at uni I realised I didn’t need a degree to do what I wanted to do, and I became more inspired by other business owners. But I knew I needed to know more, after years studying and working in bars and restaurants, I hadn’t explored my dream enough, so I started looking for work in the industry. I took a gap year from my course and started finding work more closely related to what I wanted to do. Nobody leaves Sheffield, everyone who comes stay forever, its one of those places. The music and art culture is second to none, and this was the perfect place for me.
Work, home, family...
I met my now husband soon after leaving uni, and we moved in together within a few weeks. Its crazy when I think about it, but you know what, we’re still together 17 years later, so it wasn’t completely crazy... We met through a mutual friend who I’d been sort of hanging out with for a couple of weeks. We just clicked, and we ended spending all our time together. We found a little house, and stayed there for 10 years - that house holds so many memories, way before we bought our twins home there for the first time, we travelled, partied (a lot), and built our little life.
Twinning is winning
We found out we were having twins, won a luxury holiday to Italy, and got married all in the same year. It was definitely a wild time. I’d entered this competition, and low and behold i get a call to say I had won - how funny, we were so excited, so I booked it for the next may. Well, it was only a few months before this that I had been made redundant for the 3rd time from my latest job (which I hated), and I had just turned 30, so we had just decided that maybe trying for a baby was probably the best time to do so - starting a family, I was 30, I only had a few years left, with 4 years between us too, just seemed to work. We found out were pregnant by January 2016, it was so quick - we couldn't believe it. I got really sick, and 12 weeks later at the first scan, there they were - the nurse said ‘well i know why you’ve been so poorly, there’s 2 in there’ - I don’t really remember, it was a shock, but at the same time it wasn’t. I’ve always had a sixth sense and I know everyone says they want to have twins, but I genuinely said I would have twins when I was younger - and so I did...
Sadness lit the bulb...
We got married that Christmas - you’ll never believe it, but while in Italy, I was 18 weeks at this point so fairly heavy. They nearly didn’t let me fly home, ha ha. Will proposed and we came home engaged - well, knowing me, kind of started a little comping hobby, I started aiming to win stuff for the wedding, and surprisingly I won not only stuff for a wedding, but a venue, a whole venue, with accommodation and everything we needed for a full weekends wedding. So obviously we booked that, and our favourite time of year, at Christmas. We chose that same year because Will grandparents weren’t well and his grandpa wanted to see him get married.
Goodbye old friends;
When I was pregnant, an old friend from uni took his own life, his choice to depart this world at a time when I was bringing new life in to the world, knowing I was having a boy too, was hard. 4 months after our wedding grandpa passed away suddenly one morning, and then a year later we sadly lost Nana. It was a tough time, but they left us our future, and our kids future, we bought our first house and started a new adventure in the country. 2 years later, the twins Nana got sick - she sadly passed not long later, and her husband, he died of a broken heart. Saying goodbye to so many loved ones in such a short space of time, and caring for them in their final days was our worst time. The juxtaposition of all the joy we had a round us, studded in between with tense overwhelming grief lead us to adult in a way we had never had to adult before - we were the grownups suddenly, and we had to build a life for the kids. This could not ruin us...
The legacy ...
Its all about family - we started the gardening firm and developed that in to a business while being fulltime carers. When they sadly passed we inherited the family home, which we turned in to business number 2, our luxury holiday let in Sheffield. And now, we’re developing business number 3, I’m here, and I’m launching, this final business is our passive income, our journey in to home education and our mission is to open an arts and education retreat, to host events, courses, arts classes, music, and all the amazing things I’ve been dreaming of sharing with everyone.
Thanks for reading my story. I hope I inspire you like my story inspires me.
Love, amz